In ROTJ Leia says
"somehow I've always known"
If she has always known then did she know when she kissed him?
Answer
There's a difference between consciously and unconsciously knowing. No, she didn't consciously know this - i.e. she wasn't aware of it.
Leia meant that the connection she always felt towards Luke now made sense - the one that she originally misinterpreted as sexual love, but realised was (appropriately enough), sisterly love.
Even when Leia kissed Luke she had other motivation - to annoy Han in particular - this, combined with a sisterly love she didn't know was in fact a biological connection, was enough for a kiss.
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